|
Post by COLIN COX on Nov 1, 2013 7:17:59 GMT -8
tagged: knight. time: May 9th, approx. 3 p.m. speech: colin. notes: dear whoever reads this, SUCK MY DICK \o/ This had almost seemed like a scene from a movie up to this point. They were sitting down, talking, sharing how they felt about something traumatic that had visibly shaken him. It wasn't as though her words could take the bad thoughts away and kiss everything better, but it was nice to be reassured that she was with him, that she supported him, that he wasn't overreacting to what had gone down. And if this had been a scene from a film reel there might have been soft music playing in the background, and dim lighting to accentuate the mood. It would have been quiet, relieving, a momentary sense of reprieve from the action and drama that had been spinning around and around. And as he continued unloading his laundry, he couldn't help but be grateful that she was putting up with this. He would probably have driven almost anyone else mad with his various complexes and idiosyncrasies-- he had to be grateful that she was going out with him.
But upon Julie's comment about his being a Pomeranian, the soft piano music would have halted with the screeching sound of a record scratch.
"No."
His eyes widened as his jaw fell open. He could take the comment about being a cat. He could take the comment about being a sloth. Heck, even Pikachu was kind of cool compared to what she had just said. No, no, no, he was certainly not that fluffy was he? He hadn't expected her to name a big dog, or anything in particular-- okay, maybe he should have seen a statement like that coming, but he wasn't going to admit that out loud. Colin was not pleased. Not in the very slightest. But she seemed completely determined, and was wearing a smug smirk on her face. He couldn't help but wonder whether she'd given this some thought in the past. He wasn't quite sure whether he really wanted to know.
"I would not be a Pomeranian," he snarled. Though it was definitely arguable that with the way he was acting at that point, he was being just like a fluffy puppy who was in a huff. Colin took one of the trays and stormed off to the dryer like a five-year-old that had been denied a lollipop. Never mind what he had just been thinking, this was the worst girlfriend in the world. What had he done in a previous life to be stuck with someone like this? 0/10 Would Not Recommend. He turned back towards her, glaring.
"And you get to be a Spaniel. Why do you actually get to be something cool? Take that back." With that, he swung the door to the dryer open. With a single motion, he practically tossed half of his clothing into the machine. He had no idea what he'd done to deserve this treatment. (Okay, he was most definitely acting like a Pomeranian at this point, up to the part where he would pee on someone's shoes if he was upset. Not that he was going to actually do it as a human being, but still.)
Colin said nothing more as he aggressively shoved two nickels into the coin slot.
|
|
|
Post by JULIETTE DUBOIS on Nov 10, 2013 9:26:14 GMT -8
"No?" She asked, mock shock written all over her face as she stared at him wide-eyed. Julie couldn't possibly imagine why Colin would be upset with being compared to a cute little Pomeranian. They were walking balls of fluff, what wasn't to like about a Pomeranian? He was being so immature about this, honestly. She had to cover her mouth to keep herself from laughing at him, but she managed to control herself before she started to giggle. What a baby. They were just talking about a hypothetical situation where they were turned into dogs, and he was getting all in a huff over it. Yes, Julie had found it, the reason why she was dating him: he was always giving her a reason to laugh at him for a thousand years.
(And she'll be laughing for a thouuuusaaaaaand mooooooooooooooooore.)
She wad dating a literal toddler, and she didn't mind in the slightest. "Yes, you totally would." She replied matter-of-factly to his snarl, a beaming, sunny smile plastered on her face. What in the world did he have against Pomeranians? Maybe he had had a traumatic experience with a Pomeranian in the past? That would explain it; and he was too embarrassed by the ordeal to tell her about it. Oh well, too bad for him. It just gave her more material to mock him forever. "Because I actually am cool." He really was having a hard time understanding all of this; maybe she should try explaining it differently. "Look, it's a fact Colin. You're a cute little fluffy baby Pomeranian. Please accept it and move on with your life."
There was no way in hell Julie was budging from this; for one thing, Pomeranians might as well be Colin's spirit animal. And for another, it was bothering him a lot more than it really should have, which meant she was going to milk it for all it was worth. She was clearly the best girlfriend in the world, there was no question about that. "I stand by my decision. You are a Pomeranian." She dug through her bag, before she found a pair of overlarge sunglasses she had bought on a whim when she was out with Cal. Smoothing her face into a dead serious expression, she slowly put them on, solemnly stating in a monotone, "Deal with it." Yup, she was definitely the best girlfriend, 11/10, would highly recommend.
|
|
|
Post by COLIN COX on Nov 10, 2013 13:39:54 GMT -8
tagged: knight. time: May 9th, approx. 3 p.m. speech: colin. notes: dear whoever reads this, SUCK MY DICK \o/ "No," Colin practically spat once again. He was not a Pomeranian. While he was at it, he could be intimidating if he wanted to be, and he was most certainly Not Cute. Never mind the fact that he was consistently ID-ed even in England where the drinking age was eighteen, and he had been ID-ed in Germany where the drinking age was sixteen too. (Julie had laughed for a million years after it happened, and he had been reduced to a stewing ball of rage.) Never mind the fact that he more than occasionally shopped in the kids' section at Walmart. Never mind the fact that he always paid children's fare when he ate at buffets. No, he was Not Cute At All. In order to prove that to Julie, he was going to have to respond like an adult, so he buried his face into his hands and groaned really loudly. Kind of like a dying whale shark, only more fluffy.
"Never mind," he muttered. Okay, yeah. He was cute, but he wasn't going to admit that out loud, especially not to Julie. It would mean that she had won, and that would be the literal worst. He wasn't going to let that happen. Ever. So he decided to say nothing more about the entire question as he sat down on the chair next to the dryer, crossing his arms like a mature adult. He took a glance up where his girlfriend was still standing, digging through her bag as she reminded him that he was a Pomeranian puppy once more. It was probably a good idea to just drop the subject and not say any more, and he was fully prepared to be the bigger person and do that. Good thing he had decided on that, too, because Julie did something that made him absolutely speechless. All he could do was stare slack-jawed as she put on the massive sunglasses, declaring, "Deal with it."
"You're joking."
His tone was like that of someone who had just seen a ghost: harsh, whispered, and absolutely horrified. How had she-- where had she even gotten those? Why had she even picked them up-- right, never mind, this was Julie, he'd almost forgotten. The important question was now why he was even dating her. He should have seen the warning signs from day one. This relationship was an utter mess. Good bye friends, he was gone. Colin slumped backwards, shaking his head from side to side. No, he wasn't going to even give that any more acknowledgment. Had she bought those glasses just so she could make that statement? Had she been saving them until she found the more opportune moment? Probably, actually; this was Julie they were talking about, after all.
"I hate you so much."
But even as he said those words, he knew that she knew it wasn't true. This was just another day for the two of them. She'd find something else to laugh at him for soon enough. And then he'd find something else to laugh at her about.
And you wondered why people thought they hated each other?
|
|
|
Post by JULIETTE DUBOIS on Nov 10, 2013 14:18:36 GMT -8
Yes, this was it. The moment she had been waiting for.
Julie couldn't help it; she cracked up laughing at the expression on Colin's face and his horrified whisper at her joke. Yes, when she saw the glasses she knew she needed them just for this joke. Yes, she had literally kept them in her purse this entire time just so she would have them on hand when the opportunity presented itself. Yes, she had been waiting all this time just for this moment. And it had been so worth it, if only because now Colin would question their relationship even more than he already was.
"Dead serious!" She chirped, a beaming grin on her lips. He had to be seriously regretting asking her to marry him by now, huh? Just as planned. She kept the sunglasses on her face as she moved over next to him, feeling like some kind of bug alien species. These things were huge, okay- she definitely didn't have to worry about any UV rays with these bad boys on. She leaned in closer to him, then lightly poked the tip of his nose. The perfect retaliation, if she did say so herself. He'd never know what hit him!
His comment just proved that she had struck gold with that idiot joke, and Julie gave herself a pat on the back on a job well done. "Love you too." She replied cheerily, knowing full well that he didn't mean what he said at all. If the two of them truly meant it when they said they hated each other, then they would have broken up a long, long time ago. She yawned and leaned her head against his shoulder, a wave of sleepiness suddenly washing over her. Maybe... maybe she would take a quick nap when they got home.
|
|
|
Post by COLIN COX on Nov 10, 2013 15:26:21 GMT -8
tagged: knight. time: May 9th, approx. 3 p.m. speech: colin. notes: dear whoever reads this, SUCK MY DICK \o/ Colin just glared as his girlfriend flopped down next to him, declaring that she loved him. Had Julie not realized what she'd done? She'd compared him to a Pomeranian puppy, and brought an Internet meme into the real world. If she thought that she was going to get any loving words or sweet murmurs, she had another thing coming. "That makes one of us," he muttered back in return. But he couldn't help but lift a hand to stroke her hair: she did have very nice hair, so it wasn't like he was doing it because, he, you know, cared or something. He would know, considering how long she spent on it in the bathroom.
"I see how it is. You get to sleep, and I'm not allowed to." Okay, it was difficult to not smile while she was lying down on him, and her eyes were closed so she wouldn't notice. So he didn't resist as his lips curled up involuntarily, and his insides did that little fluttery-flop that they did every time they touched. Three years into a relationship, and she could still make him feel like a kid. "This isn't fair. I want my money back." But he rested his head on top of hers, closing his eyes as well. It would be nice to just drift off...
No. Colin jolted himself awake. He wasn't going to sleep, not here. The least he could do was be awake so that he could shake her when they were done so they could both flop into bed. Besides, she'd done enough taking care of him for a while to come. With that thought, he pulled his phone out from his pocket, and opened his Tumblr app.
Time to yell at stupid people on the Internet and aggressively reblog pictures of cats.
|
|
REITGERTE
Staff Mod
WANT TO MAKE A CONTRACT?
/人◕ ‿‿ ◕人\
Posts: 524
|
Post by REITGERTE on Nov 11, 2013 6:53:53 GMT -8
| | | Finished Thread
You have been rewarded with one residue as this thread is now complete. It has been placed in the archives under the 'finished' sub-board. You are more than welcome to PM fate if this thread is not finished or if you are unhappy/unsatisfied with the amount of residue that has been rewarded. Keep up the great work and keep posting with other members.
|
|
|