Hold this thread as I walk away

HOLD YOUR BREATH AND COUNT TO TEN

"You're busy," Donovan noted, not that he'd been expecting otherwise.  He'd come to think of Kyu-Sik as the kind of person that would make work for himself even if there wasn't any.  The type of person that probably didn't appreciate being interrupted at work.  Yet here he was, without much in the way of a good reason.  Overcoming his hesitation, Donovan curiously stepped over to where the other had been pinning together pieces of fabric.  Bright yellow and the only comment he could mutter was a half-hearted "fascinating."  Well, he never made any attempts at understanding fashion. 

Holding up the plastic container of food, Donovan felt it made a rather flimsy excuse for his presence.  But it was all he had.  "Maybe you're hungry?" he asked hopefully, hadn't even much time to prepare anything too special.  A sandwich and slices of pear were visible through the sides.  "I wanted to thank you for..." and Donovan's smile became strained, wanting to carefully avoid the subject he still wasn't too comfortable with.  "For letting me borrow your clothes."  The oversized shirt he was wearing now was his own, covered in a print of various cats.  The pants, however, belonged to the much taller man, cuffed sloppily at the bottoms to avoid stepping all over the hem.  He glanced down, becoming quite aware he couldn't easily offer to give them back yet. 

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HOLD YOUR BREATH AND COUNT TO TEN

"I don't think yellow would suit me," Donovan decided with some amusement at having the offending garment held up, not caring about what would agree with his complexion or the right tones for his hair, but an outright conflict between anything too bright and his personality.  Muted and bland generally worked for him.  Something that had been faded after too many washes.  The idea of new clothes at all made him a bit uncomfortable, but it was interesting to see what Kyu-Sik could piece together as he looked around for more examples of his work.  Probably far more expensive than anything bought off a rack.  But wouldn't it be nice to have something that actually fit.

Donovan kept himself a good distance away from any of the work tables or the various machines he couldn't readily identify, afraid of bumping or messing something up.  Handing the lunch over, he hoped that he wasn't expected to leave now.  Instead, he took a seat on chair probably meant for clients.  He wasn't about to leave. "Your mother," he admitted, sounding a tinge embarrassed.  "I think she thinks I'm homeless, but when she saw the holes in my socks she slipped me your business card and said you better mend my socks for free.  Don't worry, I just bought new ones instead.  I don't need anything, I just wanted to see you... if you were okay.  After.  That."

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HOLD YOUR BREATH AND COUNT TO TEN

A small chuckle, remembering the fussing he went through at the Moon household when they had shown up soaked in rain.  The worry had almost been comforting, though at the time he'd been nearly numbed silent.  Whatever explanation that Kyu-Sik had given for their state, Donovan hadn't even registered.  Nodded along, accepted the dry towels and tried not to get dirt everywhere. 

Kyu-Sik's mother wouldn't be too far off in her assumption by the next month, but figuring out his living situation wasn't anything he wanted to think about in that moment.  He took the pear slice when he realized he hadn't bothered with any lunch for himself, finishing it off in small bites.  "I've been more fine," he answered slowly, trying to appear less bothered than he was.  If Kyu-Sik was okay with what had happened, then it wasn't fair to bring down the mood with his own worries.  "But I've also been less fine."  He survived.  They survived.  It was over, and he was fine. 

His fingers twitched, and Donovan busied his hands with cleaning off the lenses of his glasses on the hem of his sweater.  "I just... you know." 

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Maybe it had been a mistake to even bring it up, and Donovan felt the usual drawing of himself inward whenever he tread the line of sharing too much that Kyu-Sik always managed to pull out of him.  Whether or not Kyu-Sik was actually receptive to such revelations, he doubted.  Nevermind hovered on his lips, which he nervously moistened with a quick flick of tongue. He shook his head at the presentation of the sandwich half, both in answer to not having eaten much and a decline.

Was it fair of him to burden Kyu-Sik with his worries? He wondered how the other could be so unshaken and accepting of the events, not in what they had done but the mere occurence. "You're okay with... these things happening in your life?" he asked hesitantly, knowing this wasn't Kyu-Sik's first encounter with what shouldn't be. Maybe the novelty had just worn off, but the idea of becoming used to that sort of thing was unsettling. "I just can't stop thinking, what if it happens again? I..." Donovan trailed off, frustration muddling his ability to string words together in a way that communicated the correct tone of what he felt. He refused to label it as guilt. It wasn't even fear. Just a growing sense of unease that his life might be heading in a direction he didn't want, and no confidence he could stop it. Some people wished for interesting things. Excitement to take them away from their dull, repetitive lives. All he ever wanted was the mundane.

"Because I'm trying to convince myself that it won't happen again... But instead I feel paranoid every time I step out of the house. I keep checking to make sure the dagger is there, just in case. My blurry vision has turned everyone into ghosts." Donovan closed his eyes, feeling like this must be the beginnings of some sort of diagnosable madness. 

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HOLD YOUR BREATH AND COUNT TO TEN

If Donovan had been looking for empty consolation, he wouldn't have gone to Kyu-Sik. There really wasn't anyone he could turn to for comforting. But Kyu-Sik's reasoned tones were far more valuable to him than any false promises that everything would be alright. If the other believed the chances of more to come were likely, then Donovan knew his only option was to be ready. The confirmation that he wasn't merely being paranoid, or that at least it wasn't uncalled for, was oddly reassuring.  All he could hope for was that it wouldn't be too soon.  Though perhaps time would make him too complacent.  

"Usually I prefer to ignore problems until they go away," Donovan admitted, fully aware it wasn't an admirable trait. He wasn't good at this sort of thing, felt somebody like Louisa or Moose would be far better suited to dealing with supernatural threats. Yet if he managed to survive once, maybe there was more self-preservation inside him than he previously realized. He nodded along, trying to patch together what confidence he could manage. 

The question of trust was not one he was expecting, the mistake of answering it incorrectly in the past burning through his memory. Donovan never considered himself a great judge of character, because he seemed to misplace it far too often. He frowned, knowing he didn't even trust himself in even the most basic sense. "Yes," he answered with emphasis to make up for his hesitation. "Maybe it's naivety, but I do."  He liked to think that maybe he had somebody on his side, for once.

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HOLD YOUR BREATH AND COUNT TO TEN

It didn't sound like a lot, especially when Donovan only kept his phone around as a glorified GPS when he couldn't find his way in the city or to figure out the bus routes. He never understood the sense of urgency and importance everyone seemed to have while speaking far too loudly into their expensive phones.  His phone only held a short list of mostly unused contacts, one soon to be obsolete with his roommate's inconvenient exit. As much as Altan had caused trouble in his life, it was far easier to live with him than figure out what to do without. He still didn't want to fully consider what financial struggles he'd face in the upcoming months, afraid it'd be enough to drive him into a state of panic.

Adding ghosts into the mix, living alone suddenly made him a lot more uncomfortable, feeling unprepared to handle whatever was slipping through the cracks of his admittedly shaky perception of reality when he didn't even have a stable foundation to stand on anymore. It made it almost too easy to envy Kyu-Sik for his family, for his security. But that wasn't really fair. Still, he doubted the boy ever had to face the looming threat of not having a place to sleep for the foreseeable future.

Having Kyu-Sik only a speed dial away could be useful, at least to soothe any fears of being too alone. Since he was on Altan's plan and there was no telling how soon that service would be cut, Donovan was faced with the realization it'd probably be best to drop his cellular plan completely as a way to save some money. Using only free wi-fi around the city should have been enough for his needs. But with Kyu-Sik's offer, one that he couldn't even be sure he'd have opportunity to fulfill, Donovan nodded with reluctant acceptance. Maybe he could get one of those cheap pay-by-the-minute options. Better that than nothing in an emergency. Given how the last time ended with him killing somebody, the idea of getting the police involved didn't seem to be a viable option. Kyu-Sik insisted they hadn't done anything wrong and Donovan was inclined to agree despite his lingering doubts, but the police weren't likely to be as forgiving.

"Thank you," he managed before the silence dragged on too long, looking down intently at his folded hands and wondering if he was supposed to announce intentions to leave. As much as he wanted to linger around for as long as possible, he didn't want to interfere with Kyu-Sik's work or potentially anger any manager that might not take too kindly to his presence. "I really appreciate the... I'm not used to anyone caring. About me." It felt pathetic to say despite the truth of it, even presumptuous that the other boy even had without him saying so. Looking back up at Kyu-Sik, almost shyly through his glasses and curls, his eyes clearly read Do you? without having to actually voice the question.

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HOLD YOUR BREATH AND COUNT TO TEN

It'd been easier when he could classify what he felt for Kyu-Sik as merely a passing interest. He'd had plenty of brief and unexplored crushes in the past, things he never pursued and that had made it safe from ever having to actually confront the object of his affections. Never had to obsess over what words he would say, or the infinite ways he could screw it up.  Before the mere impossibility of it being returned had prevented him from getting too caught up in any misplaced fantasies that this could actually go anywhere, saving himself from any possibility of heartache. And yet every glimmer that it wasn't as unwelcome as he'd convinced himself...

The subtle nod was all the confirmation he needed, glad that Kyu-Sik had turned away after to hide the sudden rush of warmth to his face that would have given him away if he hadn't managed to do so already. He didn't need to push for more, not now. There was still the risk of scaring himself off, and he could guess Kyu-Sik was having his own issues of getting comfortable with the idea. Donovan was rarely overcome with hope, always expected to be let down long before letting himself get too attached to wanting something. But maybe it was the near-death scare that made him more open to letting this play out without his usual methods of self-sabotage. "Saturday is... yes, I'm not busy," he agreed, holding himself back from sounding too eager to be cast another line, as if he had any other options to consider. Apartment hunting that weekend might be wise, but he liked to pretend that was further off than it really was.

"Did you have anything in mind?" Donovan really didn't need any elaborate set ups to be content, and in regards to both of them simpler options were far better suited. He hoped Kyu-Sik didn't feel pressured to come up with anything too original to suggest in order to justify spending time together. As long as it wasn't a walk through the park.

Glancing down at his haphazard cuffing job to keep the bottoms of the trousers from getting trampled, he slowly caught the implications that the modification of hemming them would be permanent and therefore an offering of him to keep them. He had to trust that Kyu-Sik understood his intentions of returning them, that the Korean didn't view him as unreliable, but didn't want to argue the point in case it seemed like he was doing anything but gratefully accepting. He was willing to take it as an act of charity without any defensive feelings attached, didn't want to make Kyu-Sik feel uncomfortable with any act of kindness. Not when such kindness was so rare in his life. "Could you? I've been afraid of ruining them." He had no doubts that the fabric that they were constructed with cost more than the entirety of the rest of his wardrobe, though it was the fact they had belonged to Kyu-Sik that had made him far more careful with them than the rest of his clothes.

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HOLD YOUR BREATH AND COUNT TO TEN

That's all he needed to lighten up his mood, the line of worry through his brow smoothing over. A plan wasn't any guarantee that nothing would happen between this moment and then, didn't eliminate the looming sense of danger, but having something to look forward to was enough to keep him trudging through the next few bleak days. "I'd like that," he answered with a bright crack of a smile, abandoning any pretense that he was anything less than pleased by the prospect of another not-date. One initiated by Kyu-Sik this time, no longer burdened with the uncertainty of imposing that came with always being the one to ask.  Fed his desire to be wanted.

"I've only been to one museum before," he admitted to keep himself from admitting anything deeper, wondering what sort that Kyu-Sik had in mind. He'd never seen an art gallery, but that was what automatically came to mind.  He hoped it wouldn't be too crowded, but things inevitably always were on the weekends. "But that was a creationist thing, and..." Donovan trailed off with a self-depreciating shrug, knowing that was another one of those topics that clearly illustrated the ignorance he grew up in and was still unable to quite shake.

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